- Parents with kid-chaos: turning stressed out families into positive parents and calm kids.
- Teachers with classroom cashes to classroom calmness.
- Entrepreneurs and small businesses with workplace woes to workplace wisdom.
June 2022
FireBreathinRob Podcast
USA, June 2022, BullyProof Yourself & Your Kids
May 2022
Steps To Sobriety
USA, May 2022, Instant Evolution Out of Stress
Diva Hustle Radio
USA, BullyProof Yourself & Your Kids
Behind The Story with Chuck Tuck
USA, BullyProof, Grumpy to Grateful, You’re Not Bad
March 2022
Thrive Caregiving, USA, How to Avoid Burn Out with Stress-Busting Strategies
Strong, Single & Human, Australia Podcast, BullyProof Yourself & Your Kids & Instant Evolution Parenting
Alberta Teachers Association Conference, Canada (Greater Edmonton), Instant Evolution, From Chaos to Calmness in the Classroom
Shut Up & Grind Podcast, USA, Instant Evolution Out of Stress
FireBreathinRob Podcast, Instant Evolution Out of Stress
Read My Lips, Radio Red Creativity,
USA, Dissolving Stress Delivers Creativity!
February 2022
Central Alberta Teachers Association Conference, Canada, Instant Evolution, From Chaos to Calmness in the Classroom
Radio Book Talk with Kate Delaney, Emmy Award-winning Host, USA, The Kid Code, 30 Second Parenting Strategies
Preferred Company Radio, USA, The Kid Code, 30 Second Parenting Strategies
Joyful Parenting Coaching & Middle School Moms Round Table, BullyProofing for Teens
Ready to Fly Virtual Event, The UK, De-Stressing Strategies for Kids Off to College
January 2022
Divorce Right, USA, Dissolve Stress with Your Ex & Everyone Else
Chasing The Insights, New Zealand, Workplace Woes to Workplace Wisdom
Diva Hustle Show, USA, Dissolving Stress Before It Detonates
Chat & Spin Radio, The UK, BullyProof Yourself & Your Kids
KYLA Radio, USA, The Kid Code, 30 Second Parenting Strategies
Behind The Story, USA, The Kid Code, 30 Second Parenting Strategies
Girls Throw Too Podcast, The Kid Code, 30 Second Parenting Strategies
2021
Eko Inspiration Center, Nigeria, December 2021, The Kid Code, 30 Second Parenting Strategies, BullyProof Yourself & Your Kids
Chat & Spin Radio, The UK, December 2021, The Kid Code, 30 Second Parenting Strategies
Women on Purpose Summit, USA, November 2021, De-Stress to Be Your Best
Alignable Health Conference, USA, November 2021, Dissolve Stress Before It Detonates
Enrich & Inspire Conference, Canada, October 2021, From Chaos to Calmness in The Classroom
2002 - 2013
BreakThrough Classes, 2002 – 2013, Presenting in six countries as a Certified Conflict Resolution Facilitator on how to go from inner conflict to inner peace.
During her career, Brenda taught conscious conflict resolution in six countries. To broaden her expertise in turning chaos into calmness, she studied and applied the work of the awakened masters who live without stress. They include Eckhart Tolle, Byron Katie, Sadhguru, Mooji, Guy Finley and more.
Brenda has also been in private practice for twenty years where she's devoted herself to helping people free themselves from upsets and inner conflict—in 30 seconds! She discovered that joy is natural to all of us and she enthusiastically helps people rediscover theirs (all day long) by using one of the strategies in The Kid Code.
She has proof that this work works—people across the world have found 'right now relief' by doing it, and she went from grumpy to grateful, herself—and—from blaming to blossoming herself and her kids.
Her and her husband have three kids who gave them eight grandchildren and that means family get togethers are a happy reminder that kids bring everyone to life.
You can’t put a lid on lava, so when it starts to blow (in kids or adults) it’s good to have some strategies to slow the flow! I give parents ideas for reducing the possibility of a child having a tantrum in the store and what parents can do to stay calm.
50% of the stress in a household can be dissolved on day 1 of everyone using this simple strategy because it works on mistakes and negative states.
It’s important that parents understand the far-reaching effects of emotional upheavals and negative states: they fracture relationships, are biologically addicting, and are physically damaging to us. These are not our natural states, and that’s why we feel so bad when one strikes. This work takes us back to our natural, wise, belly laughing, playful self.
The reader/listener will be entertained by the quirky relationship between parents and their kids, like, how did we go from telling them bedtime stories to them telling us tall tales?
What is wellbeing, and how can we recover it? Is it a new car or a new pair of shoes—or is it a naturally peaceful inner state?
From zero to twenty we do some growing, but not much growing up, not realizing that we do have the ability to keep ourselves much calmer than we do!
Since history does repeat itself, I invite parents to help themselves carve a new parenting path and put themselves in the wise position of being able to teach children how to successfully navigate their conflicts.
This discussion will give parents a break-down of the mechanics at play when an upsetting emotion arises and shows them something they’ve likely never spent much time considering (taught by Eckhart Tolle): big emotions confuse us and then we become irrational—while insisting we’re right. Parenting from this place is painful.
Twenty-seven easily accomplished strategies are offered to parents that will immediately bring them in to a balanced state, and can be used in an upset, or just to establish us more solidly in a coherent state, even when there is no upset (making deposits into our ‘peace bank’).
“Go to sleep,” hollered from my bedroom didn’t work with my kids because dismissing a child’s fears doesn’t dismiss the fear—parents learn two simple strategies to dissolve fear in kids and themselves. I still use this to dissolve fear when it arises!
If you can come to the understanding that consequences are naturally tied to every action we take, it dissolves stress and the need for discipline. One way to explain natural consequences is this: if it’s raining and we go outside without an umbrella, we get wet. The action is going out without an umbrella and the consequences is getting wet. Accept the consequence and there is no problem! To teach this to a child you can invite them to think about all the things that happen when they don’t hand in a test on time and when they do. When they don’t hand the test in on time, the natural consequence is that they have stress, berate themselves, blame others, become a victim, fight with parents, and have stressful consequences from home and school. If they do hand the test in on time, the natural consequence is that they don’t have stress, don’t fight with parents, and don’t have problems with the teacher.
Parents learn ways to forgive themselves when they punish a child, and we examine the idea that punishment doesn’t deliver what it promises to.
Parents will learn how to naturally take their focus off of the problem and put it back onto the person and oddly that makes the solution to the problem easier to find.
A list of common mistakes (for example, looking at our thrones of ignorance: unloading, blaming, judging and criticizing) helps bring parents to the realization that some of the ways we’ve been taught to be in the world are just stressful, not helpful or healthy.
A conversation about this will help parents begin to question beliefs because they are the cause of our pain—kids operate without beliefs so it must be possible—they don’t need a belief to put their hand in ours or to play with a child who has a different skin color. Those ways of being in the world are natural to them. Self-realized Masters don’t have beliefs—or stress. Our nature knows what to do at any time. Do we need to believe in honesty for it be natural to us? Or is it natural without a belief? Might the belief in honesty cement a link to dishonesty in the psyche?
Parents and kids are introduced to a quick way to go from resistance to ‘contemplative’ by using one of Byron Katie’s tools to look at any upset from the opposite position and feel clearer about decisions. For example, if a child says, “I don’t want to go to that school,” invite them to turn it around to “I do want to go to that school,” and find three reasons it’s true or truer.
Parents will become clearer that they have a choice: when an upset comes along, we’ve come to a ‘Y’ in the road (as taught by Guy Finley) and that we’re not too old to say to emotional upsets, “You’re not the boss of me.”
Parents learn a simple way to show kids that they want to feel as good when fun time is over as when it began by practicing the ‘good’ feeling just before the fun time is over.
Several strategies that increase a child’s security are shared here so that parents, whether their child is being bullied, or is the bully, have some tools to bring their kids into a strong, clear state, and to courageously meet and defeat the bully within and in our outer world.
Once we know, everything changes. When sailors thought the world was flat there was fear and worry about falling off of it. When it was discovered to be round, that awareness changed the sailors perception. The knowledge from doing this work brings understanding to the parent that an ‘aha’ moment from using a strategy does the exact same thing. Awareness changes how we parent when a deeper understanding than we previously had is made known to us.
Parents are given a new perspective on lying and new ways to talk to their kids about lying: lie detectors prove it causes us stress (we’re trying to reduce stress, not create more of it), we’re betraying ourselves when we lie (lying to get the other’s approval is saying we’re not good enough the way we are), and there is a lot of stress-causing pressure to hide, defend or act out the lie.
Because of this letter from a child to the parents, parents will be able to bring more clarity to the impact fighting has on a child and reframe how they fight.
Parents don’t want their kids to experience adversity, yet it’s unavoidable and it’s also the very thing that grows us, so it’s best to teach them the simple strategies for coming into clarity, coherence and understanding when challenges appear.
Parents living with a child who lives and learns differently to us need special parenting skills and some are offered here. If we think they don’t fit, we just haven’t discovered that they do—and that they are good teachers.
How To Bless a Mistake and why it can reduce the stress in a household by 50% on day one of everyone using it. Not getting stressed out over mistakes and negative states is for our own wellbeing. There’s magic in the message, “You matter more than the mistake.” Learn to give yourself and others Grace not grief when a mistake is made—it creates respect and connection, and dissolves stress. Being kind also comes naturally to us. Belittling another doesn’t. How we know that to be true is to see how we feel inside when we bless and when we belittle.
Kindness towards others is for our own wellbeing, too.
Getting Rid of Anger is vital because it gets in the way of wishing others well. Not giving anger a place in our lives is important because it’s towards our own wellbeing.
Teaching Children to Bless Mistakes through stories from Mr. Upalupagus’s Secret Secrets.
Sample Story: Yelling Boo is Not Good for You: Mr. King Cobra with no fangs keeps scaring Ms. Gazelle and nothing seems to stop him. Ms. Gazelle avoiding him doesn’t stop him, Ms. Gazelle screeching in his ear doesn’t stop him, even when she accidentally kicks him when he scares her didn’t stop him. Tuskie has a secret secret that stopped him!
Learn to recognize when you’ve encountered a bully by how they act and what they say.
Insecurity makes us into bullies and into victims.
Learn strategies to dissolve the beliefs that attract a bully.
Simple self-inquiry methods melt away the inner critic, the inner judge, jury, and executioner.
This valuable strategy gives kids an advantage when they meet a bully and helps them know what to say and do.
Hear from the Author herself about all the wonderful things you will learn by reading The Kid Code.
You assume and accept all responsibility and liability for using the content contained herein. This content is not intended to replace professional advice.
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